


Consolation

by TearsOverQueerbaiting



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Consolation, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Angst, Crying, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Mean Deceit, Prinxiety - Freeform, Villain Deceit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-02
Updated: 2019-10-02
Packaged: 2020-11-22 06:29:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20869721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TearsOverQueerbaiting/pseuds/TearsOverQueerbaiting
Summary: Virgil consoles Roman, and realizes Roman's not 'just a friend' to him





	Consolation

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: there's curses, there's crying, Deceit's kinda the bad guy?? (I love him but I need him to be mean rn)  
OH! By the way, when Deceit's lines are bold, it means he's lying

“Hey Roman can I talk to you-”

Virgil stopped mid-sentence. He had just come into Roman’s room, hoping to be able to talk to him in private. Virgil had seem how enchanted Roman was by Deceit. He felt like he needed to change that, he needed to talk Roman out of it. And yet, in Roman’s room, talking to him, was Deceit.

“Virgil! **Great** timing! Would you mind to **stay**? Roman and I were **totally not** having a private conversation!” Deceit turned to him, annoyed. Virgil’s blood started to boil. That snake _belittled_ Logan, _depressed_ Patton, _manipulated_ Roman the entire video and even after he lost the discussion, he came to Roman’s room to mess with his emotions _even more?? _

“Uh, Roman, what is _he_ doing here?” Virgil tried, and failed, to control his tone as he said that.

“He… came over, I guess” Roman gestured to Deceit, embarrassed. _Came over?_

“If you want to call it that…” Deceit muttered, earning an annoyed look from Roman, that, thankfully, Virgil didn’t see.

“Why? What would _you_ call it, Deceit?” Virgil replied, getting even more aggressive.

“He was desperate, he was practically begging for consolation, and it didn’t seem like any of you were talking to him” Deceit looked at his nails in a sarcastic way, considering the fact that he couldn’t see his nails, as he was wearing a glove “And you can lie all you want, but you both know that Roman enjoys my compliments” Deceit let out a small sarcastic laugh before continuing “And Virgil knows they aren’t lies”

Roman looked at Virgil suspiciously. What did that _mean_? But Virgil was full eyes on Deceit, too filled with anger to care about anything Deceit might say, any secrets he would “_accidentally_” spill.

“Oh, doesn’t he look _adorable_ like this?” Deceit walked around the room to Virgil, that stood still as a rock, despite his desire to scream, because _Roman is listening to Deceit, Roman can’t go through what I’ve been, Roman doesn’t deserve this_. Deceit paused with his hand on Virgil’s cheek, a teasing move “When he gets angry? Oh, I **never** found him so more attractive in his ‘evil’ mode, it **doesn’t** make him sexier!”

“You’re better off flirting with _Roman_” Virgil almost hissed, jerking his head to the side, away from Deceit’s plastic gloves.

“Jealous now, are we, kitty?”

Had not been the unsettling situation, Virgil would have laughed “Of you? Never!”

“You know I didn’t mean me, Virgil…” The anxious side paused, completely petrified. What was he talking about? Virgil wasn’t _jealous_ of Roman! He was just worried about him! The only reason he would get angry when Deceit flirted with Roman was because Roman was his friend, and he didn’t want his friend to be manipulated! Right? Right?

Deceit smiled, analysing the situation with a smirk “Well, I should probably **stay**. My damage here is done. And Roman…” he added, turning to the fanciful side, who had been staring at the ground for a long time, now turned quickly when he heard his name “Don’t be afraid to call me”

Deceit sunk down, leaving the two sides in a silent room, a very awkward, silent, room. After what seemed like ages of the silent spreading between the two of them, pushing them more and more away, Virgil grew the courage to start talking again.

“Roman…”

“I know your opinions on Deceit, Virgil, I don’t need to hear them again!” Roman interrupted, annoyed, his gaze on the floor again.

“Roman, I’m not _letting you-_” Virgil continued, this time though.

“I don’t need you to _let me_ do anything, _Anxiety_!” Roman yelled, angrier than Virgil had ever seen him.

Virgil had been hurt before. He had been ignored before, he had been shouted at before, Roman had done all those things at him, but that was in the past, and Roman calling him Anxiety, his formal name, hit him like a dagger. Roman hadn’t called him Anxiety since he learned his name, a step towards intimacy between the two of them. And the way he said it, it was the way he used to say it, with anger, with annoyance, with disgust. Nothing, _nothing_ that Deceit could ever do would hurt Virgil more than this.

But Virgil wasn’t the only one hurting. As the fanciful side said that, he raised his head, and Virgil saw tears staring to form, and all his thought focused immediately on that.

**Shit, shIT, SHIT! Roman’s going to cry. God, what do I do? I’m not good at this! I can’t do nothing, Roman’s crying, for God’s sake, I need to help him! I hurt him, shit, shit! I hurt him!** That thought hit Virgil like a train. **He hurt Roman. **

“Roman” Virgil tried again, this time softly, almost like a whisper, because he was scared of opening up, he was scared to be intimate with anyone, he pushed everyone that got close away, he didn’t want intimacy, intimacy was _scary_, intimacy was a _weakness_, people could use it again him, _Deceit_ could use it against him, but he needed to be open, because he’d fucked up, he’d hurt Roman, and he needed to fix this.

“I’m not letting you be hurt by Deceit the way I was” Virgil walked over to Roman, driven by instinct, by some damn instinct, the same one that made him desire intimacy despite despising it, and gently put his hands on both sides of Roman’s face. That was it. Roman broke down. Tears started to roll, and Virgil’s heart begged in agony, for it was hurting, hurting like never before, and Virgil would do anything to protect Roman, he would fight anyone that hurt him, but he could’t.

He couldn’t fight whoever was hurting Roman, despite wanting to so badly, for some unknown forsaken reason, because that was an inside job. Only Roman could fix himself. All Virgil could do was stand there and comfort him.

Still holding Roman’s face (though Virgil would, in any other situation, be very uncomfortable by the physical contact and the lack of space between the two of them, because trust me, they were _very_ close), Virgil continued to talk, because he needed to say these things, and if he didn’t now, he might never. “I know you don’t want to hear this, and I’m sorry” Roman sobbed, and Virgil’s heart wrenched again. That almost made Virgil quit talking, but he continued, some tears forming around his eyes now “But Deceit’s dangerous, Roman! I _can’t_ have you hurt, Roman, _please_!” He begged.

Roman looked at him, the pain evident in his face, his eyes and cheeks red from crying, eyelashes stuck together from tears, those (Virgil didn’t understand why that thought came into his mind) beautiful brown eyes staring at him in despair, and it all hit Virgil like a blow. And he finally understood.

He finally understood why Roman saying “You make us better” made him feel so… warm. So different. So _good_, like he could actually make Thomas better, like he was useful.

He finally understood why seeing Roman in the new outfit made him feel so… weird. Curious. Embarrassed. Eager to look at Roman, but afraid the others would see it.

He finally understood why it made him so happy, smiling like a child, when Roman complimented him on his new look. Why it made him feel welcome, for the first time in his life.

He finally understood why, since then, he had this icky feeling around Roman, this bubbly happiness, this eager to make him happy, these… _butterflies in the stomach_… whenever Roman smiled, and made Virgil always melt, because that smile, that _smile, oh that smile,_ that smile could light up worlds, that smile could make Virgil forget everything, that smile made Virgil smile, and Virgil despised smiling, he was cold, he was edgy, he was closed off. But for Roman… for Roman, Virgil wanted to open up, tell him all his secrets, tell all his thoughts, for just a slight chance that Roman would smile more. Why he was nearly begging for scraps of Roman’s attention, of Roman’s smile.

He finally understood why he would go through everything for Roman, he would wear stupid sweaters (and he remembered, daily, night after night, the look on Roman’s eyes when he put on the sweater, despite trying very hard to focus on _anything_ else), he would sing the stupid song Roman came up with. He would try to be kind, and kindness is a scam, you should say your true thoughts straight to people, but for Roman, he would hold his words the best he could, he would try to be kind, not harsh, because Roman deserves it.

He finally understood why he had that urge to be close to Roman, even though he despised physical intimacy to the highest degree, why he had an instinct to touch Roman, to hug Roman, to not have anything between them, not one millimetre, so that there is nothing else emotionally between them.

With his head reeling, losing sense of what was reality and what wasn’t, getting lost inside Roman’s beautiful, _beautiful_ brown eyes, Virgil finally understood why he wanted to punch something whenever Roman was sad, why he wanted to comfort him, why he wanted to do everything in his willpower to stop that sadness, why he would stand up even to _Deceit_, because it was Roman, and he would defend Roman no matter the cost, because it would kill Virgil to know that he could have protected Roman and he didn’t.

With a bang, a shock, a sense of hopelessness and a sickening despair, Virgil understood, something he should have understood a lot of time ago, the first time looking at Roman made him feel iffy, made him red, made him desperate, made his heart race pace up, feeling something extremely different and extremely similar to panic. He only realised it long after Deceit and Patton noticed it, but he realised it.

He loved Roman.

_He loved Roman._

** _ He loved Roman._ **

He loved Roman, with his fancifulness, with his perfect hair, with his blinding smile, with that confidence that charmed Virgil so much, even though now Virgil knew a huge part of that was fake, with that charm, with that need for romance, with all these problems and these flaws that Virgil didn’t give a shit about, that Virgil wanted to heal. He loved his polar opposite, he loved that blinding and warm light that emanated from the creative side, he loved every single thing he once hated.

He loved Roman, he wanted to hug him, he wanted to hold him, he wanted to kiss him, he wanted to know the taste of those lips, he wanted to tell him everything would be ok, he wanted Roman to know that Virgil’s heart was completely his.

All of this happened in a second.

The next second they were both on the floor, sitting in a weird position, Roman crying desperately, Virgil embracing him, tears streaming down his face, muttering “it’s okay, it’s okay” while Roman sobbed.

“I wanted that so bad, Virgil, _so bad_, it hurts, it hurts so much” Roman said, in-between sobs.

“I know, I know, I’m sorry” Virgil muttered. He suddenly pulled away from the hug to look right into Roman’s eyes, because that was something you needed to say looking eye-to-eye “Roman, I’m so proud of you, you know that, right?” Roman looked at him, shocked. When was the last time Virgil complimented him? “I know this doesn’t change anything, and I know it will still hurt, and I know that you made a huge sacrifice today, but I need you to know this. I’m so immensely proud of you.”

Roman sniffed, the tears stopping to roll, and smiled, a small, sad, smile, still so powerful that made Virgil’s heart jump around like crazy, and slowly, carefully, pulled away, and got up.

Virgil quickly dried his tears with the sleeve of his hoodie and got up.

“Thank you, Virgil” Roman said, still smiling sadly, and rubbed his hands over his eyes “I… really needed to hear that”

Virgil slightly turned his head to get a better look at Roman “You’ll be okay?” They were both whispering, maybe because the air and the tension between the two of them was so fragile, anything louder would smash it into pieces. “Someday I’ll be” Roman let out a small pity laugh, and Virgil understood what that meant. For now, it would be okay. Maybe it would come back. That’s how life is. Someday, Roman would grow out of it. Virgil swore to himself that he would do everything to make Roman feel good.

“You look like you need some… space right now” _And I need to think about some stuff too_, Virgil thought, avoiding Roman’s gaze.

Roman nodded, silently, and Virgil started to walk towards the door. “God, I look like a mess right now” Virgil heard Roman mutter to himself. He wasn’t wrong. His usually tidy hair was draping in front of his face, his face was flushed, his eyes were puffy and red, his attire messy and creased.

Still…

“You look perfect” Virgil whispered to himself before closing the door behind him


End file.
